In this flash talk, presented at our 2018 Future Assembly, Professor James Mickens from the Harvard John A. Paulson School of Engineering takes us back to the basics of blockchains. Haven’t we been here before? Yes, but according to Mickens, we’re due for a recap. Using humor and an impressive slide deck, Mickens illustrates the mismatch that frequently occurs between blockchain technology and what we’re trying to do. In short, there are a lot of misuses out there and we need to be more thoughtful about the specific scenarios where blockchain technology is a good idea and has potential.